As parents, we’re always worried about our kids. We want them to be safe, happy, well-cared for, and successful. I know that as a father, one of my greatest joys has been watching my kids grow up and into people of character.
Nothing about fatherhood is easy, but you sure can make it easier when you’re intentional about what you pass down to your kids. I’m not talking about the inheritance (though yes, remember to write and update that will!) but instead the habits and values that well empower them to make good choices that lead to longer, healthier, more secure lives.
I know – easier said than done.
Here are a few ways I’ve learned to pass on good habits from financial literacy to eating well.
4 Ways to Pass Good Habits to the Next Generation
#1) Model the behavior you want to see.
This is the first and perhaps most important step in getting your kids to value the right things and develop good habits rather than bad ones. You must model the behavior that you wish to pass down. Don’t be a “do as I say, not as I do,” kind of dad. We all have our moments of hypocrisy – don’t make excuses for them.
This shows up in a few ways:
· Prioritizing family time that isn’t in front of screens. Have a game night, regular family dinners, outings, and exercise together. This gives you ample opportunity to deepen your bond and have real conversation and meaningful experiences.
· Make good choices for your body. That means skipping the drive thru (and explaining why), making a point to cook fresh meals, and choosing regular exercise instead of vegging out.
· Save and invest wisely. Demonstrate daily integrity, self-control, and diligence in any and all work that you do – and with the money you make from these endeavors.
#2) Reinforce the “why.”
Modeling behavior only goes so far. Kids learn a great deal through imitation, but that doesn’t mean the behaviors will stick without a solid anchor. Children and teens live “in the moment” and aren’t often considering the consequences of their actions in the next week, let alone in the next year – or ten, or fifty!
Help your kids understand why you do what you do and why you want them to do the same. Explain that dad has more energy to play when he’s getting regular exercise and that he’s happier. Let them know that because you manage your money wisely, you’re able to go on family trips, afford nice gifts, and join sports. You eat healthy not just to look good, but to feel good and stay that way. Kids of different ages will be able to understand more complex reasoning as they age, but it’s never too early to stress why you do what you do.
#3) Include them when you can.
Don’t let your children feel like outsiders looking in. Sure, there are some things they don’t need to know or don’t need to be involved in when it comes to adult responsibilities. I urge you, though – push past the temptation to exclude your kids just because it’s faster and more convenient to do it on your own.
Encourage your kids to get in the kitchen to cook meals together. Take family walks and bike rides. Help them make a budget for their allowance or other earnings just like you have for family finances. Not only does this create more opportunities for familial bonding but it allows your kids to build confidence through repetition. You’re helping them know what they need to do and how to do it before it becomes any sort of crisis.
#4) Demystify tough concepts.
If schools are anything today like they have been in the past, there’s a pretty good chance your kids will have the opportunity (if not the requirement) to take high school and college-level courses on things like finances, health, and nutrition.
Learning from my own experience, though? Don’t rely on these courses to get the concepts to sink in. While the education system can explain and reinforce good habits and skills, they don’t necessarily make them stick. That’s often because there’s a disconnect between institutional learning and real-world application.
So do the work yourself as early as possible. Translate concepts like vitamins and calories to daily mealtime and in selecting good snacks. Make it a rule that your child must save a portion of their allowance. Invest some money on their behalf and show them how it grows over time. The more you can explain these concepts and connect them to real, practical behaviors, the more they’ll sink in…and stick!
What habits do you want to pass on to the next generation? Share in the comments.